


Life goes on (but I've missed you)

by flowerrichie



Category: Ginny & Georgia (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fix-It, One Year Later, Post-Season/Series 01
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-18
Updated: 2021-03-18
Packaged: 2021-03-27 04:34:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30117219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flowerrichie/pseuds/flowerrichie
Summary: Marcus would like to tellI missed you too, but he purses his lips because in his mind there are too many questions, chaos barely manageable. He shakes his head. "I'm not gonna tell you if you're gonna disappear tomorrow. Because the last time I told you that I loved you, then you were gone. And-" he shakes his head again. "I'm not gonna push myself that further. I don't want to have my heart broken again""I didn't mean to""We didn't mean a lot of things"
Relationships: Marcus Baker/Ginny Miller
Comments: 7
Kudos: 51





	Life goes on (but I've missed you)

**Author's Note:**

> I never posted something about a show I barely know, that it's at its first season that came out just a few weeks ago (and that I finished it a couple of days ago). I usually go through a bit more pain, before pushing me that further with a fic. But there aren't many stories here, so I couldn't resist and went with it.  
> Hope there aren't mistakes (of course there will be, but I hope there aren't too many)!

Life goes on. That's what everyone had repeated to Marcus in the past years and, well, he tried. He's not the most brilliant kid, he's not doing fine every day and he has terrible skills befriending people because he's too generally disinterested in almost everything around him and he's stoned most of the time, so others don't really like him and tend to ignore his presence, but life goes on and he lives day by day, taking what he can. Which is almost only loneliness and extremely quiet existence. 

Once the house was his comfort zone, literally. He talked there, even too much listening to his mother, but lately things have been weird, secrets messed relationships up and even though it's been almost a year -ten months and half- Max isn't really acknowledging him more than what a civil living requires. They talk, surely, but there are topics that they don't face and it's there, not dealing with them and with each other disagreements, that they refuse to admit there are, in fact, problems. Probably don't talking about them makes their relationship simpler, easier, but both of them know those problems are there and not acknowledging them will make them explode, one day or another.

He lives mostly through habits: school, skate, home and then skate again, when his parents think he's in his room at night and he wanders somewhere else to get high with people that he doesn't even know. He keeps up with everything, so until he doesn't get caught, he's fine. Life goes on, doesn't it? 

When Ginny came into his life, she was fresh air. But fresh air comes like a surprise, when the window is open and the curtains start moving lightly, and, as it touches your body with goosebumps, it's already gone. Now, Ginny is missing from Wellsbury for almost ten months and a half and Marcus' life has moved on. Or he tried. 

He did his best, he even stopped looking at the neighbours’ house hoping to see her face looking at him sneaking out at night, lightened by the soft light of her room. But she wasn't there, nor the first nor the tenth, so he forced himself to not even turn and it became another habit: sneak out and walk away. Simple as that. 

Ten months and a half later, Marcus thinks he did good, because he did what he could and there have been days that he barely thought about Ginny, which was  good . Not good-good, but good-less miserably and he even dared to feel proud when he flirted with a girl at a party he went to at the beginning of the school year. It ended pretty much there, at the first stage of flirting, but life moved on after Ginny and left Marcus trying to catch up, looking ahead, instead of behind. She left and he had to face it, in a way or another. 

Now, school passes normally again. Homeworks, essays to write at the last minute, people to nod to in the hallway without stopping by, eating alone away from the crowded cafeteria and getting high in the meantime. Sometimes he spent his break with Padma again, without making out for once, but her friend hates him and he eventually started to skip that too, knowing it was for the best. 

Better alone, drawing, smoking or wasting time contemplating his food, or his feet while walking back to class and avoiding eye contact. The same way he learned to not look for Ginny's face peeking through her window, Marcus learned to pass by in the corridors without looking for her eyes scanning him, or laughing with the rest of that her group of friends with that stupid name,  _MANG_ . He did it well in the past months, summer came and then school started again and now he does fine. He really does. He went through much more shit than a girl breaking his heart, leaving him after he told her that he did love her. 

When school ends on that autumnal day and Max is talking to Norah like her life depends on it, exaggerating like everything she does, he rolls his eyes and just walks by them, ignoring the pair and being ignored in the same way. They did not really acknowledge each other in the past and even less now, after last year's mess. So he pushes the main door open right after, walking out and enjoying the nice temperature warming him up.

There's been good weather, lately. Nice sunny days that he spent going around his skate, hearing his mom complain about getting homework done  _for Christ's sake_ . He walks around with his jacket, obviously he does because it is not  that hot, but it's been nice after all and, even though his face mostly doesn't show any emotion except disgust and disinterest, he's enjoying it. The sun in those autumnal days is a nice companion and skating is a pleasure, with the wind through his hair and the eyes squeezed to fight the natural light. He rolls down easily and lightly on the asphalt, like he owns all the time in the world, even though he really doesn't and it's a blink of an eye the change from the crowded city centre, to his quiet, posh, neighbourhood. 

When he approaches his house, he doesn't see it straight away. 

Actually, he's about to keep skating towards the main door of his house and walk through it, when he double checks and he almost falls from his board. Instead, Marcus' feet jump from it thanks to good reflexes and lands on the asphalt, even though a bit uncoordinated, feeling a rush of adrenaline and surprises going down his spine. The skateboard, temporarily forgotten, rolls away, until it collides with the edge of the sidewalk and stops. The boy barely acknowledges it, but his eyes are glued over his bike, parked in front of his close garage, where it hasn't been for ten months and a half. Not that he's counting. 

There's a moment of stall, or uncertainty, and maybe even fear, that suggests him to not even think of  _her_ . But it can't be a coincidence, can it? He steps closer, one foot after foot, and he feels stupid because he's probably playing dirty with himself, letting his mind seeing more than what it is. In the end, he never knew if she ran away with his bike, or it was just an awful coincidence, that someone maybe stole it from their garage the same day. He doesn't even believe himself, as he thinks so, and approaches it, the bike that is clearly still recovering from his accident and that shines under that sunny day. 

A noise stops him on his track, head that snaps and eyes that scans everything that moves in his visual: his heart is pounding fast and isn't fear, he's not scared, because, at this point, he can  _feel_ her here. Even without seeing her face, all the uncertainties dissipate and his stomach drops again and again, when a little round face appears shyly from around the corner. Something says that she's been hiding, not surely from him now. Then Ginny, missing from his life for ten months and a half, waves slowly at him and attempts a shy smile. "Howdy, neighbour"

  
  


The tension is palpable. 

They have been sitting there for the past five minutes, in that diner picked just to avoid the Blue Farm after Ginny said  _a quiet place_ and Marcus got that she didn't want to meet any familiar face. They walked in a rigorous and forced silence from their neighbourhood to the place, or, better: he made sure to state a point on agreeing to listen to what she wanted to say once arrived at their destination  _and_ keeping his mouth shut during the walk at the same time, which meant she should have worked hard to make him soften. In fact, when she tried to break the ice making comments or remarks, he simply… Stayed quiet. Because he assured her he was okay with sitting and facing what she wanted to talk about and what he had a vague idea about, but he wasn't up for chit chats and she got it at the second attempt, when he refused to speak except the necessary and his face stayed contracted, furrowed, while his heart kept  _jumping_ inside his chest. She must have sensed the mood, because she whispers a  _thank you for accepting_ and then she fell silent, matching his long steps as best as she could. 

Now, he can see Ginny is nervous. She keeps looking between him and the waitress getting their orders ready, while he doesn't move his stare from the view of the window. It's a place a bit out of the chaos of the centre and he picked it because he was sure it was out of all their acquaintances' choices. He wouldn't choose it himself, if it were any other occasion, but it seemed like Ginny didn't want to be seen and Marcus guessed she carried her secrets back with her, the sneaking and all. He wondered if anyone knows she's here, back in Wellsbury, but he didn't dare to ask. Mostly, because he made a point at not talking, waiting for her to be the first to face the conversation he knew he couldn't run from as they approached the diner. Inside, he was actually excited about eyeing her, sitting in front of him with a too light jeans jacket for Wellsbury's weather and her hair that are now longer than her shoulders, but he tried to keep an appearance anyway for the whole waiting. 

When the waitress interrupts his staring out of the window to the semi desert street and Ginny's uncertain look on him, by announcing herself, he turns just to see a plate of fries and two Cokes being served on their table with a smile. He tries to reply to that, but he isn't sure his mouth showed it properly, while Ginny murmurs a  _thank you_ that it's barely audible. Once alone, Marcus grabs his drink and he's not even sure he's thirsty, maybe he just wants something to occupy himself with, avoiding starting with the fries they picked  _to_ _share_ . He didn't really care about food when they ordered, he just nodded to Ginny's proposal and she could have asked him  _anything_ and he would have accepted anyway. 

"So" she starts, once alone again. There are a couple of people inside the place, but Marcus doesn't recognize any of them and, after a double-check, he looks at Ginny. A sense of instability shakes him. "How are you?" 

He lifts an eyebrow and, even though that's exactly how a conversation should start, politeness and all, his nervousness makes him almost laugh at that. He refrains the need growing in his throat, but the sarcasm comes out even before he can think of it. "I'm fine. Thanks for asking. Hope your road trip with my bike went well"

To that Ginny sighs, like she knew he would have pushed her like that. And she can't blame him, so she attempts a half-smile, encouraging, friendly, but  scared . "I know you're mad. And it's fair, I'm not gonna-" 

He rolls his eyes and, well, now he's the one who expected something like that coming from her mouth, so he makes a face and intercepts her. "I'm not mad" 

"Aren't you?" she asks and surely she doesn't believe him. "I know I shouldn't have run without say goodbye, or explain why, and I'm sorry about that" 

Marcus' lips tighten and his hand squeezes his Coke, like he would like to destroy it, because he can't stop thinking  _here we go_ and it makes him unstable. "I couldn't even stop you. I know it. It's been easier this way" 

"It wasn't easy"

"I said  _easier_ " his eyes lock on the plate full of fries and avoid making eye contact with Ginny, who's currently observing him. He can feel it. "For me it was. I didn't have to watch you leave, knowing I didn't have any power over it, so it's been  _easier_ . Your mom came screaming to our house that you and Austin weren't home when you were already gone, so I didn't have to even try to convince you to stay. The damage was already done" he shrugs like he's talking about the weather, but Ginny sees the tension on his shoulders and posture. " _Easier_ "

This time, when Marcus looks up, pushed by his a bit harsh words, Ginny is the one looking down. The foods between them untouched. "I'm really sorry" 

He shakes his head. "I just hope you found what you were looking for. I hope it worth all the trouble" 

"Sort of" then their eyes found, like magnets and Marcus' heart melt at Ginny's guilty face, to her furrowed eyebrows and her pursed lips. 

"I'm not mad. I'm really not" the boy whispers, but she can hear anyway because suddenly she is super aware, eyes wide and expression contracted. "It's just… I didn't expect it. I thought you could have come back so many times that now I have no idea what to think" he points between them. "What does this mean? Are you going to stay? Are you leaving soon? Where have you been for the past year? And, why do I have this feeling that no one knows that you are here?" 

Paradoxically, Ginny eyebrows furrow even more and Marcus is about to think she will explode in a cry, when then she takes her face in her hands and rubs her eyes. When she frees herself, she sighs. 

"You're the first to know I'm here" the girl pushes the head on a side and makes a face, when her eyes meet Marcus and he looks like he's tasting this revelation. "Except Joe. Austin and I are staying at his place, but I have to tell my mom soon because he won't keep it quiet for long. He thinks I should have already told her, but I promised to go to her, once I talked to you" 

Marcus' jaw squeezes, because if Ginny came to him first -before everyone else, except Joe, but Marcus understands that he couldn't obviously give her a place to stay, because at that point everyone else would know she's back in town- must mean something. Doesn't it? "Where-where have you been? For the past months. With your dad?"

"I've been around" she admits and he feels like he can hear her mind processing the moment, probably studying what to say and how to, reliving her past year. He hoped it went good, after all. Then she smiles and when Marcus thinks she's gonna avoid answering or lie about it, she talks and her tone is honest. "Me and Austin went to my mom's family. Her sister and mom. She has a step-dad too. It didn't last long, turned out she didn't lie to me when she said they weren't nice people. But Austin didn't want to leave our cousin, so we stayed a month or so, after a couple of weeks of driving. Isn't easy moving when you're a black sixteen years old girl with a white kid with you. People looks were more than suspicious"

"What after?"

"We went to my dad's" she explains almost like it's a bad thing, which Marcus knows it shouldn't be because Ginny loves his dad. "I didn't plan to, because  _she_ obviously found us the same day we knocked at his door. But it's a been safe place and she tried to bring us back, but eventually she got that we didn't want to" 

"Why" he shakes his head and suddenly he's a bit more comfortable, so he leans with his elbows on the surface of the table between them. She blinks and he remembers Georgia leaving for a couple of days: he noticed, because they met in the street and she gave him a tight smile that was sad, but also pitiful, and he remembers his stomach turned upside down at the sight of her that looked worse than he has ever seen her. Then she drove away and he stayed there, in their posh street, looking to a house that looked so empty to hurt. He skated away with Georgia's face smiling at him like  _she_ _knew_ , like she understood what he thought every time his mind drifted to her daughter and how he was coping with her missing from his life -sudden as she came- because surely a mother could have understood: no one could have suffered more than her. "Is she really that bad? I mean, everyone has problems with their mothers, I think it's mandatory" 

Ginny blinks. "She did things I didn't approve of. But I needed time to figure out why she did them and eventually understand them. Sometimes you need a little push, you know?" 

He's not sure to know, actually, his mom grounded him so many times that it lost count and it eventually started losing any meaning. But Marcus nods anyway. "Georgia was really out of her mind, when you ran away. She's been at our house for a couple of days and she thought you told me something. I had to convince her I didn't and even my mom made me one of her speeches about how important was to find you" 

Ginny nods. Once, then twice, when she finally grabs a fries and eats it extremely slowly. It looks like a desperate gesture. "I'm sorry about all the troubles I caused. Hope you can forgive me" 

"Not sure there's anything to forgive" he admits, slow and low. He attempts a smile, but it's weak. "Not for me,  again . It wasn't a nice moment, it's been pretty rough for a while, but I knew you had a reason. Whatever it was. And I had just to learn how, you know, avoid walking to your window, which saying it like that seems a really creepy thing to do. My mom made me another speech about how I should not do that ever again and how to respects women and their personal spaces" 

Ginny's lips smile, her eyes are suddenly watery under the light of the diner. "It could have been a bit creepy at the beginning, but, you know, I liked you and then I liked it too, the window thing. I missed that" she clears her throat and takes an encouraging breath. "I missed you" 

Marcus would like to tell _I missed you too_ , but he purses his lips because in his mind there are too many questions, chaos barely manageable. He shakes his head. "I'm not gonna tell you if you're gonna disappear tomorrow. Because the last time I told you that I loved you, then you were gone. And-" he shakes his head again. "I'm not gonna push myself that further. I don't want to have my heart broken again"

"I didn't mean to" 

"We didn't mean a lot of things" he assures and he thinks of all their history, short but rough, to all the secrets and the wrong words. Like when he told everyone that Ginny and he were a mistake: not once he ever thought about them as a mistake, but, honestly, he believed it was the right thing to say and help Ginny out of the trouble, when the moment to face all her friends came. He thought that, if everyone else believed that they didn't mean to, that they  _happened_ to have sex, maybe the damage would have been still fixable. He wasn't really sure Max had any right over who Ginny or he were sleeping with, but he got that for the girl he loved, her friends' approval was important and he would have said  _anything_ . They would have tried to make something else work once alone. But any of those things happened and, the day after, he tried to fix it but Ginny was already about to go and he eventually had to face it.

He knew he wasn't the problem, nor her  _MANG_ friends, she would have stayed and fought for that. Instead, he heard enough about Georgia's character from Ginny that suggests that the issue was definitely family related. He didn't understand it, and he still doesn't, but somehow -among all the mixed feelings- he respected her choice. Or he learned to. 

"I know you didn't mean it" Ginny interrupts his thoughts and they are thinking about that night, the  _Sing Sing_ one. "Once out of Wellsbury, I was scared that you may think that I didn't believe you when you told me that you didn't consider us a mistake. I wondered if you believed me when I said we were fine and I couldn't do anything about that anymore"

"I did" he assures. "Not sure we could have made it work with the whole drama, but I was positive we could have figured something out" 

Ginny nods. "I would have liked it. But I had to-for other reasons, I had to leave and you weren't part of the problem"

"I know" 

"What if-" she starts, then she looks out of the window for a long moment. When she glances back at Marcus, all his attention is already on her. "What if I'm gonna stay?"

He's not sure he knows what she wants him to say, because of course he would like her to and she should surely know that, but he also doesn't want to get all away so easily, all up for her just to be left behind again. Their history isn't definitely the sweetest, with the secret sex and the mistakes he made from the beginning to the end, mixed with all Ginny's weird signs, all the glances and the half kisses she almost gave him back while she was with Hunter and he (kind of) with Padma. Now, the tension comes back crawling down his spine and he almost misses her arm stretching over the table, palm up, like she's inviting him to take it. When he glances up to her face, she looks like it's taking her a lot of bravery, so he's  _really_ tempted to put his hands in hers. But he resists a bit longer. 

"It's not my decision, Ginny" he says slowly. He swallows and she blinks, listening. "Do you want to stay?" 

"I'm not asking you for your permission, or to take the decision for me, Marcus" she explains like she's talking to a scared child. "I just want to know how you would feel about it. If I chose to stay. I have so many people to ask sorry and try to prove I want to fix things. My mom, your sister, the girls… And I don't want you on that list too. I want to know you're okay with me staying, to be friends -or whatever you want us to be- and to know that there's someone that won't try to kill me-"

He chuckles. "No one is gonna kill you"

"You clearly don't know my mom" but she's laughing softly when she says that. "So?" 

"What about-" he stops the smile on his face. "What about what you said to me? That I'm just gonna hurt you?" 

Ginny lips purses at that, what left of her laugh dies on her lips. She straightens her posture and, when she unconsciously moves her hand away from the table, Marcus fingers grips her wrist so she can't retreat completely. He doesn't really  _think_ to do that, he just does it by reflex and she's confused at first, then their eyes lock and she relaxes under his unexpected touch. Frankly, she thought he wouldn't have taken her hand, now, surprised, she slips her palm against his own. 

"I had plenty of time to consider things and feelings" she whispers. "And, again, didn't I hurt you back many times by now? We can start being friends, Marcus, I didn't mean-" 

"We already tried that path. And didn't work the last time" he says, grinning nervously at her. 

"I don't even know if you're seeing someone" Ginny answers and there's something in her voice that tells him  _I'm not gonna do the cheating all over again_ . They broke enough hearts the past year.

"I'm not seeing anyone" he assures. 

"I still think we should be careful with that this time" she insists. "I didn't ask to talk to you just to get back together. Or whatever we were. I want to know we're cool, for real this time, that you still trust me"

"I do trust you" he says and, well, all his hard behaviours are being thrown out of the window by now. "Do you know my feelings didn't change since you left, don't you? I still mean everything I said. I can go with being careful, but if you're gonna stay, why don't we get on with the full ride? Feelings and all. Me and you against everyone else, what about that?" 

Ginny contemplates it, his words said like he meant that. For once, Marcus doesn't look scared and it's miles away from the boy who walked through her bedroom window just to have sex and look cool, at least at the beginning, when he was ashamed to tell he was a virgin and that she was his first time. Ginny remembers how she felt when he told her the truth and she realized he was just shielding himself with the whole  _I'm cool_ attitude. She thought the one to blame it's always the society they live in: keep appearances, don't let your guard down, even though you're a good looking white boy. There are expectations turned into stereotypes to fit in. Ginny learned to live with others stares pointed at her for her whole life, more than Marcus could ever understand, but, because she saw much shit than him, she eventually got him. 

_He gets me and I get him_ , she screamed to her mom when she found out he sneaked into her room and that surely was the start of something. Now, Marcus looks more honest than she could ever think of and when she ties their fingers together, the  Okay she whispers is barely audible, but he smiles and she knows he heard anyway. 

"I missed you too, neighbour" 


End file.
